Welcome to the only movie Kevin Smith Directed but didn't write. The movie where Kevin Smith fell out of love with Bruce Willis. The movie that convinced Smith to only direct his own movies. A movie that while not well received is still incredibly funny.
Willis and Tracy Morgan's characters have been partners for 9 years. Something that Morgan thinks is awesome but Willis could care less about. Morgan goes in to try and get some information out of the suspect by doing famous lines from movies. When he gets to a die hard line Willis said he has never seen that movie. It's a funny moment.
It gets Morgan the information he needs for him and Willis to start their case. While on the case we find out that Morgan thinks that his wife is cheating on him. It distracts him throughout the movie.
The bad guy shoots up the school and runs. Morgan in a cell phone costume runs after him. It's the funnest stupidest thing ever. The bad guy escapes by hoping in front of a train. The dude risked his life to get away. He deserved to get away after that. It gets both of them suspended and just in time to mess Willis up just before his daughters wedding.
Willis can't afford to give his daughter the wedding she wants and her step dad keeps pointing out that he can. You can already see how much tension there is between the two men. This suspension could not have come a worse time.
Morgan puts a nanny cam in his house to spy on his wife who is very buddy buddy with the next door neighbor. Meanwhile Willis tries to sell his prized baseball card, it is right then that the store is robbed by Seann Williams Scott. There goes the daughter's wedding. He lies to the other cops about the people who stole the card so that he and Morgan can go and find him themselves.
They track him down to a house and have a standoff with him that is ended by the lady of the house showing them all up. She catches the badguy and punks all of them out. She was scary as can be! With his help they find the man who has the card. He tells Willis and Morgan that if they want the card back they have to help him find his stolen car.
They go find the worse car thief in town. It turns out it is an 11 year old kid. Who beats up Morgan, cause he is pathetic. Willis threatens to take him home to his mother and the kid tells them everything. He is more afraid of his mother than he is of the police. They steal some guys car, these are the heroes of the film. SMH.
In the trunk of the car they find a woman tied up and gagged. They let her out and take her to get herself cleaned up. The badguy wanted the car back to get the girl. Morgan asks Willis to look at the nanny cam for him so that he can see if his wife really is cheating on him. Willis looks at the footage and sees that she is hooking up with some guy but he turns it off and lies to his partner.
The two cops looking into gang stuff find Morgan's gun and call Willis asking him to meet up with them so that they can go after his partner who they think is dirty. While is dealing with them, Morgan is watching the girl and decides to watch the nanny cam for himself. He sees that she was cheating on him and is heartbroken by it.
Willis gets back to the motel and Morgan tells Willis that he say the nanny cam. Neither one of them seems to notice that the girl has been in the shower for a long long time. Willis finally opens the bathroom door to find it empty. The girl is gone. She left them a note telling them that she doesn't want them to die for her.
They get Scott out of jail to help them out. He finds out that Morgan's wife really was cheating on him and he suddenly changes course and starts acting all buddy buddy with him. Trying to make him feel better. Willis doesn't like them getting along, it annoys the hell out of him.
Scott tries to do some parkour to get into the house and get Willis's baseball card back but he is showing off and falls, hitting his head. Willis can't find a pulse and thinks he is dead. So Willis just goes in himself. Meanwhile the bad guys find the girl and Morgan watches the tape again. Once he gets past the start he finds out that his wife wasn't cheating on him. She set him up,the guy was her gay cousin. He is beyond excited and who can blame him? His wife is so hot.
Willis is still in the house when all the bad guys come home, dragging the girl with them. They are about to torture the girl when Morgan calls and tells him that he has the crucifix that the guy is looking for. He splits his forces, half of them go to the meet up spot and the rest stay there.
The two cops who think that Morgan is a bad guy show up just as Morgan starts shooting his way into the house and Willis sneaks out. Willis than joins up with those two cops to try and get back into the house. He tells them to call it in while he goes to try and save the girl.
We find out that the crucifix is really a flashdrive and it has come down to the leader of the badguys, holding the girl at gun point standing off with Willis and Morgan. They stop him and save the girl. The day is won and Willis tries to go back into the house to find his card but not before the captain stops them and tells them that they are going to get an award and are reinstated.
Willi goes looking for his card. He finds it, turns out that Morgan shot Willis's card. There goes his chance to pay for the wedding. Now he has to suck it up and ask the step father, who is an ass, to help him pay for it. His ex-wife tells Willis to let her new husband give away the daughter with him. Something that Willis agrees to even though it kills him. Morgan stops the new husband from giving the daughter away, so that Willis gets to do it alone. As he should as the real father.
After the start of the credits we see that Scott is still alive, he pranks the girl working at the morgue before leaving. Over all this movie is funny as hell. While not the same humor as Smith's own movies it is a close enough fit that you can see why they went to him to direct. I love this movie and I think most people who give it a shot would too.
Leave a Reply.
The Uncanny Fans
Welcome to the Uncanny Fans, where we dive into all things nerdy!